Scrap Heap #1

Aging: where the thin parts get thick and the thick parts get thin.

Marriage: when you hem in your haws, and gain some in-laws.

Paul Revere: Avatar 1 if by Land, Avatar 2 if by Sea.

You have to have been to have been a has-been.

I have a pet pug named Nacious.

At what point does a quiver become a quake?

I feel sorry for folks who have stubborn belly fat. My belly fat is pretty persuadable. It took out time-shares all along the Eastern Seaboard, and spends most of its time traveling between them. So it's easy for me to stay in shape.